I’ve been wanting to write for awhile, but inspiration seemed to slip through my fingers. I’d start typing and it would either sound stupid (to me) or I’d get interrupted and then forget where my train of thought was heading. Which got me thinking in and of itself – if inspiration is so inspiring, why is it so fleeting?
And now, I can’t think of anything to say to expound on this question. It’s as if my brain has forgotten how to function. My stream of consciousness is so random that I can’t nail down a thought long enough to talk about it. Currently, I am thinking about the triathlon I have signed up for and how much work I have ahead of me. I’m thinking about how I need to get a calendar set up for workouts and maybe an accompanying journal.
I’m thinking about a friend’s brother who was married this past weekend. It is a weird situation for me because for the past year, he’s talked about how I’m invited, can’t wait for me to come to his wedding, etc. But an invitation never showed up. So I didn’t go. I’m feeling slightly hurt by it. Also the fact that I invited him to my wedding which was less than two years ago is part of it. He couldn’t come, but the principal of the matter remains. But I probably wouldn’t feel this way if he hadn’t set me up for disappointment.
I’m also thinking about the start of my volleyball season tonight. I am in crap shape having not done very much physically since X was born. But it’s my favorite sport to play so even at my worst, I will still have a good time. And maybe it will help me kickstart my triathlon training.
And now I have read over this thinking it is quite boring, and I am wondering why I am going to publish it at all. Maybe in the hopes that its monotony will somehow, in the future, inspire me.
Happy Martin Luther King, Jr. Day!