In June, we welcomed our second child. Another bouncing, beautiful baby boy whom we named Oliver Cooper. He is the sweetest baby with an ability to bring a smile to my face with just the mention of him.
In late August, my little X man turned two. I’m still blown away by him daily. The way he communicates so easily now, the physical feats he accomplishes, his lack of fear of the unknown. He teaches me so much and makes me laugh. What a joy he is to have in my life.
Now this is the part where, in my first draft, I got very sad about having to leave my boys to go back to work. Lots of “woe is me” and how much I really dislike having to be away from them. While that general attitude has not changed, I have come upon a different outlook on it.
Every day, I wake up early (earlier than I have for many years) so I can be ready in time to wake the littlest up and feed him before I have to leave. I am encouraged from my slumber by this uninterrupted time with him. We just stare at each other while he eats, and I tell him about what he will be doing that day and who will be taking care of him. I tell him how much I love him and that I am sorry I have to be away from him during the day, but I am doing it for our family, so Daddy can pursue his dream. And that even though it breaks my heart to be separated from him, it will be worth it one day in the not-too-distant future.
Then I go into X’s room and roust him. The kid wakes up chatting. It is adorable. I tell him who he will be playing with that day, and he launches into a description, consisting of nouns and verbs only, of all the things he knows in regards to that topic. What used to be me describing to him what I was doing (changing his diaper, putting on his clothes), is now him telling me what everything is. Then I tell him how much I love him and that I will see him that evening when I pick him up. He says, “Mama. Work.” and gives me a “big squeeze”.
Some mornings are harder than others, and I have to force myself to walk out of the house to keep from crying. But I keep my chin up knowing this is not forever, and it makes me much more present in the time I do have with them. Never taking a moment for granted and soaking up every cute-filled second.